There are some Japanese words that just don't translate well into English, and natsukashi is one of them. To me, natsukashi is a gentle fondness of a memory that you know will never be repeated. One might feel natsukashi when remembering a perfect spring day walking next to the Matsukawa River with cherry blossoms drifting to the ground. This morning I woke up feeling a little natsukashi, remembering my family's time with Choi and his graduation from high school a year ago. So, I am reposting one of my favorite pieces, Choi to the World.
It will take me a few months to get over the absence of brilliant piano music as I prepare dinner in the evenings. Choi is leaving us after nine months of inhabiting a room in our basement and our lives. We are sad to see him go.
Choi is a Korean national who graduated from Carolina Day School a few days ago. He has attended CDS for three years, living with two other CDS families during the previous two years. Among his many talents, Choi is a gifted linguist (fluent or proficient in five languages), an amazing pianist, an aspiring badminton player, a brilliant actor, an award-winning mathematician, a divergent thinker, and an encourager of vegetable eating for my seven-year-old.
I am sure that my sons get sick and tired of me asking them questions; it is simply a byproduct of my years as an educator, and I can’t help myself. So this morning on the drive to school, I asked them what they learned from Choi over the last nine months. John Kelly thought for a while (I give tons of wait time) and said simply that it was different having Choi live with us. At first it seemed like a “duh” response, but John Kelly rarely gives simplistic reasons for anything. After a few leading questions, what he was trying to say was that he learned a lot by being forced to live differently. Our cozy family of four, with our routines and habits became different when Choi moved in last August. Changing things up, making things different, is a prerequisite for growth and learning, and this was Choi’s greatest gift to our family.
My children also had first-hand experience living with someone from another country. This will make them more accepting of others and other cultures for the rest of their lives. Wow! We had dinner table discussions about mandatory service in the military (following his freshman year at Dickinson College, Choi will serve in the Korean army for two years like all Korean males), we talked about gender roles and sexism in other countries, we listened to Korean pop wafting up from the basement, we learned that Korean children learn never to question their father (too bad I couldn’t get this going in my family).
Choi also provided inspiration to us all. John Kelly composed his own piece of music for his recent piano recital because he observed Choi’s love of music. Charlie learned some better table manners. Elizabeth and I were reminded that the world is huge and that we can still take risks in our lives.
Last week, it hit Charlie that Choi would be leaving us for good. He cried himself to sleep that night. We will all miss Choi, but we send him out into the world with our love. Choi to the World!
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